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This Diet Killed My Puppy

Do you have a dog?  Do you remember when he was just a puppy?  Cute and playful, with that puppy breath and waggly tail?

Now imagine someone coming into your home and telling you that you don’t need the puppy and that having a playful puppy that you enjoy spending time with is not only something you do not have to do, it is actually something you must stop doing.  Upsetting right?  You might even ask that person to leave.

I’ve read Albert’s posts on how this diet has changed his view on food – I’m not there yet.  I’ve successfully changed my actions for six meals.  This program has very (I mean VERY) simple rules – eat whatever you want, only eat when you are hungry, stop eating when you are full.

The problem is, I don’t eat because I’m hungry.  I eat because I enjoy it.  I love food.  I enjoy the experience of eating.  Its my puppy!  And this guy comes into my home to say – stop playing with that dog!

While going through my old draft posts (I have almost 20 of them) – I came across this:

Are you Full? Not if there is food left…
June 9, 2009 at 8:37 pm

A couple of nights ago, I ate four slices of pizza.  I consider that a victory – why? Because there were four pieces left in the box when I stopped. Most people won’t get it – but for me, that was a victory.  A difficult one.  Very difficult.  I don’t eat until I’m full… I eat until the food is gone.  But this time, I left food on the table and walked away.

Is that a victory? Last night I thought yes.  But today I heard a story about addiction that made me feel like I’m so very far away from any kind of victory.  Some people that read my blog will think, that’s right, you should have never had the pizza in your house!  Others will think, its a step in the right direction, don’t be discouraged, you can do it, one step at a time.  I move between both camps – conviction and encouragement.  (I know the encouragement crowd would call the conviction crowd more of a condemnation group, but I disagree)…

I don’t remember the “story about addition” I referred to and I don’t know where I was going with the post (maybe that’s why I abandoned it?), but I do still remember my point.  I don’t eat until I’m ‘full’ – I eat until the food is gone; or at least I used to.

Yesterday was day 2 of the Tubbs’ challenge, and I believe I have successfully stopped eating when I got full.  I have left food on my plate for six meals now.  I pasted the doughnuts at the end of the isle at work today – not because I wasn’t allowed to eat them, but because I had just eaten half a bowl of breakfast oatmeal and wasn’t hungry.  For lunch I had one of those left over mini-burgers from last nights dinner and for dinner I left half a plate of spaghetti on my plate.

I’m not starved when I follow this program – in fact, its likely exactly how most ‘naturally’ skinny people live their lives.  I understand now why people say things like “I want to save room for dessert” – they stop eating when they are full so they stop eating the main course before they are full so they can eat a few bites of a dessert.  For me, its never been a this OR that decision, its always been this AND that.

Ok – I understand that I have to decided if my puppy is worth playing with.  I know its really a rabies infected foaming at the mouth mad dog that is going to kill me… but I love him… I may not be ‘there’ yet regarding this program, but I’m becoming more aware of why I’m over weight…

See you tomorrow…

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