Don’t Eat Christmas Dinner Until You Read This!

This time of year is so focused on food that its hard not to think about what you eat, your weight, and in my case, my addiction to food.  But as soon as we think about losing weight, we think diet, then holiday food and finally, “Maybe after the holidays”.  I know because I’ve said that many times myself.  If you are a food addict like I am, an overeater – then “waiting until after the holidays” is like an alcoholic saying, “I will quit, really! Just after this last beer” – ok, maybe more like “Just after this last pub crawl”.

Most diets talk about ‘surviving’ the holidays with tips like ‘eat in moderation’ and ‘try healthy alternatives” but for a food addict, that’s just not a good idea – it triggers a binge.  The more I learn about food addiction, the more I see how little we all understand about it.  Not everyone that overeats is an addict, just as not everyone that gets drunk is an alcoholic, so it can be difficult to know that someone has the problem.  But Americans tend to have addictive personalities, we indulge ourselves as gluttons in more than a few areas – so if you see someone that is extremely overweight – just know they may have a problem.  Why is that important? I’m glad you asked.


First, let me say I still believe Everybody is FAT – but for those few exceptions out there, this list if for you.

Number 1 – Never talk about your own weight issues

Its hard enough being 50, 60, or 100lbs overweight – but having to listen to someone who has never been 20lbs overweight, talking about losing that ‘last 5 pounds’ is unbearable.  It often triggers an eating binge for overeaters.  Lets be honest here – you may really need to lose those 5lbs – and maybe that piece of pie wasn’t the best idea for you – but saying out loud infront of a food addict is kinda like saying to a crackhead – “I really shouldn’t, but I just gotta try this new crack”.

The only thing worse than listening to you talk about how much you have to lose, is listening to you talk about how you NEVER gain weight.  Seriously, would you tell an alcoholic that you can drink all the rum and coke you want?  I can just imagine that conversation – “Hi, my name is John and I’m an alcoholic” – “Hi John, my name is Cindy and I drink like a fish without getting drunk!  Isn’t that terrible?”

Number 2 – Never insist a fat person try some particular food

If they said no to your sausage stuffing when you offered it, they may be trying to avoid overeating, or maybe they are just dieting in general – but saying no the first time is difficult – saying no while you insist we ‘try it’ is impossible.  We don’t ‘try’ stuff – we eat it, and a lot of it.  It won’t be ‘just a little piece’ – it will be three pieces.  Maybe we’ve already eaten way over our daily allowance and are trying to stop the bleeding – If we say no – drop it!

Number 3 – Never play 20 questions with a fat person’s diet

If we want to talk about it, we will.  If you noticed we lost a few pounds, great! Feel free to say so, but then drop it.  Talking about food and how much we aren’t eating can be a trigger.  A friend of mine is color blind and every time someone new finds out, the first thing they ask is “what color is this”.  I may have even done that myself when I found out.  My point is, its cruel to ask such a thing – and when you hear me say I’m on a diet, I’ve lost weight, or I’m a food addict, asking me to describe my daily food intake is similar.  Evening the pat on the back for losing weight can be a trigger for some of us.  We immediately wrestle with thoughts like “you are doing so good, you deserve a piece of pie!”

Number 4 – Never tell us ‘what’s working for you’ if you have never been as fat as us

This is slightly different than Number 1 in that here you are trying to offer advice.  I love to hear how someone lost their weight – as long as their weight loss is 100lbs.  If you just lost 3lbs and in your 5lbs struggle to reach your ideal weight, shut up!  I know that’s blunt, be seriously, Shut UP!  You have no clue what it takes to lose the amount of weight we have ahead of us – but I can tell you it sure doesn’t include listening to you talk about how you ‘did it’.

Number 5 – Never tell us to drink more water

We already know.  Its not like you are giving us new information that is going to change our lives forever.  No fat person in the history of fat people has ever said “OMG, you are so right – I am going to drink more water from now on” and then went on to lose 100lbs because you suggested it.  What do you really think will occur when you say it?  Maybe the fat person you know has been locked in up a room for their entire life, and has never had an interest in losing weight or watching their diet until now – and you actually are the first person to suggest they should drink more water… that could happen, right??? Ah.. NO!  Did I mention, we know already?

Its difficult to admit to your friends that you are trying to lose weight; even more so that you have an addiction.  These are just a few of the things that make holiday dinners difficult – what bothers you the most during dinner?  Feel free to leave your own list in a comment!

11 thoughts on “Don’t Eat Christmas Dinner Until You Read This!

  1. The article starts with a blatant lie, then gives a list of instructions for how skinny people should deal with fat people.

    Sorry, but it has never worked, for fat folks to tell skinny folks how to behave.

    And here I was, assuming from the title, that the article was aimed at those of us with weight problems.

    No way would I show this article to my skinny brethren.

    1. I certainly didn’t mean to offend you – its meant more as a humorous attempt to point out the often insensitive comments made during a holiday meal toward overweight (and in my case addicted) people.

      Some of the things in the list can be (and in my case are) triggers for overeating.

      I certainly didn’t intend for you to take the title as “a lie”

  2. it’s the first sentence. In my lifetime, this has never been the season to focus on food. It’s been about family, warmth, good cheer, and maybe a bit of religion. But I owe you an apology – I so often miss the humour in stuff on the ‘net…there’s a form of humour out there that I haven’t caught on to. Honestly, those of us who have eating issues need to deal with it…if we keep waiting for the world to behave the way we want it to, we’ll never lose the weight.

  3. Hello People!

    I take this blog post to be a bit tongue and cheek. Yes maybe the 5 points were a little too close to truth but it’s funny. Do I want my skinny friends and family saying these five things? Ah, NO! I want to slap them. would I had them this list? Ah, NO!

    But now when one of these things on the list are said I’ll laugh inside and oh remember that post of things skinny people shouldn’t say. Unless there is a real jerk in which I’ll get his email address and send him the link.

    Thanks Dale for incentive to laugh this holiday season.

  4. Loving the articles one thing- can you write something like “five things a fat person should never say to a thinner person” I get sabatoged during the holidays about what I’m eating and how “I can never eat that, I’m a fat cow” “oh yeah, sure gena you just wear those jeans I’m so fat I only look good in moo-moos” etc. Its very frustrating to here self sabatoging comments all week long. I never point out someone elses weight or offer my advise about running or weightloss and yet I have comments made about my weight and my size, by “them” making comments about theirs. Every conversation is centered around who lost weight who gained it, etc. So show me some love and help out a friend!

  5. Loving all the articles, can you do me a favor and post something about “Things a Fat Person should never say to a Thinner Person” most of my Holiday conversations are centered around who in the family lost weight, who’s gained it and why, and then comments directed towards me like “oh yeah go ahead and eat that, if I did I would just blow up” or my favorite (not) “sure Gena just go ahead and wear those jeans, I’m so fat I only look good in a moo – moo” it gets tiresome, I don’t ever say “hey you look heavy” or “you know if you would just go run with me you wouldn’t look like that” so why all the comments towards me? So can you help some of the other population out and let the “so called fluffy” people know that it makes us uncomfortable to have our weight pointed out as well……

    1. Great Feedback – I just started reading a book called “Jerusalem Diet” that pointed out that most diets today are filed with shame for both the dieter and those around them. I never thought of the ‘other’ side of the belt before – Look for a post soon…

  6. Hi Dale, I am just writing to agree with what Stella has said. I too am one of those people that have been thin all of my life and although I never comment or make remarks toward fat people. I have had my fair share of rude comments like. OMG do you ever eat, you need to put on a few pounds, gee have you lost weight you look so skinny. It can be just as hurtful to us skinny people. We too battle with our weight in the fact that stress and worry can cause us to lose weight without stopping eating. sometimes we eat so much but our metabolism’s are fast and we just can’t seem to put on weight no matter what we do. Unfortunately though there is not a great deal of information for us skinny’s.
    For some reason people do not think it is hurtful or rude to comment on how skinny someone is they think we do not have feelings or maybe that being skinny is not seen as a problem. I have always battled to keep weight on so we have body issues too.
    not having a go just another side of the coin!

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